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The darkness surrounds me,
The night is falling,
Robbing me of my light,
Taking my sight,
Yet I don't burn a candle,
Don't light a match,
I keep the lamp off,
And the shades drawn tight.
I start to listen to the world around me,
What might be out there in the night?
A monster to grab me,
A ghost to give me a fright?
Yet no light do I burn,
Waiting for the night to take
Away all the worthlessness I feel,
All the hate in my heart,
For I am a creature of the night,
And the light scares me.
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another song
Now I lay me down to sleep
I fear I've cut my skin too deep
If I die before I wake
Then this life was too hard to take
A pool of blood surrounds me now
Blood so dark and pure
All because of this blade
and her magical lure
I can't resist her for long
Shes always there when things get hard
To comfort me with her soft song
Theres something romantic about her
As she sings her love for me
she slowly inflicts her pain
The harder life gets, and the more I hurt
The louder her song gets,
and the deeper her cuts become
But I fear things may have gone too far this time
Now I lay me down to sleep
I fear I've cut my skin too deep,
You don't think that you are beautiful,
but you don't see yourself through Heavens eyes.
The face you see in the mirror,
is the one that you despise.
So what can you do, where do you start?
ask my God to come heal your heart,
love hasn't gone, beautiful one.
You can't hide your despairation,
all the hurt thats buried deep inside,
but theres a God of salvation,
the One who opened my blinded eyes.
So what can you do, where can you turn?
turn to the One who died for you
love hasn't gone, beautiful one.
Theres somebody whose in love with you,
who sees the beauty deep inside.
His love runs deeper than appearences,
just call His name and he'll be by your side.
And can't you see how beautiful you appear through Heavens eyes,
And can't you see you're beautiful.
So what can you do, where can you start?
ask my God to come heal your heart.
What can you do, where do you turn?
turn to the One who died for you.
love hasn't gone
beautiful one.
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forget
Every thought, every emotion, every dream, every feeling
frozen as I reach to touch them
They are shaking and blue, frosted with ice
torn from the warm chest they once came from
and there is a hole in me where they do fit
Looking at them I remember how you ripped these fragile things from me
and it still hurts
still burns
Because I will not forget
Because I cannot forget
With trembling fingers I gather my frozen dreams
They are so cold, these frail feelings and tiny emotions
as I press them to the hollow in my being
And their ice eats me up from inside
causing me to stagger and fall
pushing them out again, away again
But their chill still hurts
still burns
Because I will not forget
Because I cannot forget
I reach to pull them to me once more
Without even breathing on them, they are melting and breaking
Icy drops, like dead tears, drip slowly from my extended hands
I feel myself mirroring them without even trying, scolding hot tears dripping, dripping
I curl up in the cradle of my own sweet darkness
but your old words tear at my old hollow, so that it grows and grows
and the old pain you left me with still hurts
still burns
Because I will not forget
Because I cannot forget
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after the blast
Picking up pieces after the blast
Wonder how long the numbness will last
A little bit here, anoter scrap there
So many pieces scattered everywhere!
I pick one up, another will fall
How will I ever find them all?
How effectively you blew my world apart
My entire universe, my soul and heart
Everything I ever knew
Died that night along with you
How very empty life is now
And I'm supposed to continue somehow
So very selfish and horribly cruel
To make me watch the final duel
I pray to God that the numbness will last
As I pick up the pieces after the blast
my joural...get to know me
a love for me?
* Chorus*
time is spinning,
I am never winning,
I am stalling,
Around me the sky is falling,
So many emotions- what do I really feel,
Have no clue on what is real,
I don't know what to do,
But all I know is I am supposed to trust you,
*chorus *
Deep down, I do know what to do,
But I am too scared to trust youm
I've been ignoring your calling,
Now my entire world is falling,
* chorus*
You have always been there for me,
But I am just to blind to see,
Ignoring the voice inside,
I go off, to hide
*chorus *
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final high
Yesterday-you were just a child at play
Today- your huffing your sins away,
The truth is there,
Your just too stoned to care,
I see the child with-in,
Screaming, screaming with-in,
For help-to get away from these sins,
*repeat *
You've forgotten all you used to be,
All you used to love to see,
Your searching for the next high,
Your scared-knowing where you'll go when you die,
* Chorus*
You've let this drug take over your life,
I look up- your holding a knife,
Holding it to your throat, your about to take your life,
Finally you listen to the silent shout,
Hands held out,
Not making a sound,
Throw the knife to the ground,
Eyes cast to the sky,
Finally you've reached your final high,
* chorus *
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